getting sianz of my blog. shud i get a new skin? hmmm.. looks kind of plain to me at this very moment. wanted to further customise it.. but i'm just getting lazier and lazier. must be the pre-effect of the damn re-opening of school. cant wait to start sch man *pui*

slept the whole day away. wanted to catch watch the fockers but stomach cramp. dun feel like going anywhere at all. so darling came over and hugz me to sleep *xin fu look*. slept the noon away. he played maplestory after tt. watch him play seemed fun. perhaps i shud try. female gamers appear more intellectual. *shrugs*

read zan's blog this noon. think she's right. actaully mum was telling me off the other day for wasting my hols. i didnt get my anicipated license nor did i get a job. i did try man. just tt luck is damn f*ck-ing not on my side. anyway, back to my point. come to think of it, i dun think this hols is wasted. zan was right in tt me, her and man were closer. much more than when we were in JC. we've been friends for so long! let me count the years.. 8 years including this year! gosh! i think i'm not ever gonna let go of this "renewed" friendship. haha.. friends are indeed forever! esp friends tt had been with u for so long, where u all went thru all the thicks and thins, all the ups and downs, all the verticals and horizontals, all the norths and the souths, all the west and the east.. u get the drift.. haha.. althou we didnt spend alot of time tog this hol, i just feel better.. as in i know tt things are just gonna be better..

dear sent me a message today in friendster regarding his tots. yupz. he told me he he resolved to spend more time with his mum coz she's very weida. i agree. all mothers are very weida! mine included! serious! my mum helped my dad with his biz, brought us up, always took good care of us, whatever we want she will get it for us, fetch us back and fro whenever we asked her to. somemore i think she also not enough sleep. some nights she also wake up early to take bird nest for us to eat. seeing dear's messgae, i felt very happy. coz i was right in him about being a family guy and i like tt. i like guys who loves their family and respects his parents and be filial towards his parents. ya. he is the kind of guys tt girls will want to settle down with and frankly speaking, there is not much of this species of guys in singapore anymore. i can only pray tt he wun kena snatched away. i feel tt our relationship is very stable now. but time is always a factor. afterall, we still have many years to come. nobody knows what will happen. but i know tt i can trust him. on my part, i can only give him my love and treat him the way tt he really deserves coz he really is a very good guy. *i love u dear!*

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

sianz to the max!! already planned to go clubbing with zan and man today. but my period came just when i wore my contacts and about to change. actually morning quite pain le but nothing came. i tot it was probably just some stupid stomach upset. sighz. somemore long time nv go club. was really looking forward to it lor. bad bad timing. *groans* now i can only cross my fingers and pray tt i can go to at least a new year party just before sch reopens. haha. sorry man n zan! pls forgive me!! lol.. actually i was so bent on going i kept pyschoing myself tt the pain will go away soon. wanted to pop some menstrual pandaol. but would be taking alcohol. dunno wat will happen so didnt take in the end. finally i have to come to terms with the fact tt i wun be going. feel so down. asked dear to at least acc me till 10. 10 came and i asked him acc me to the coffee shop. thou my stomach is cramped i just want to get out. -self denial- lol...

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZAN!! yesterday was zan's birthday. hehe, bought her a pair of earrings tt she had her eyes on.. but it's not the colour tt she wanted coz sold out le.. ya lor.. anyway, we went to kenny rogers to lunch together with manling and qiaoling. the atmosphere was nice but we didnt really say anything much. just very general talk. haha.. poor manling, mentioned tt tingle has been harrasing her with his scary tots. he got depression and it seems tt he has split peraonality as well. scary. hope he does not appear at man's doorstep one day. anyway, for those who dunno who is tingle, he's man's ex. ya. after lunch we just went to walk ard in suntec where man and qiaoling bought zan this nice-smelling moisturiser. the salesgirl was the damn hilarious lot. whoever comes into the shop and touches any product, she would announce the price of the product. machiam tt person cannot afford it sia. irritating but funny. haha.

next stop was at citylink. oh man. saw this pair of sandals i saw in JB the other day. but in diff colour. the worst thing is dun have my size!! sometimes i really hate my feet man. damn big size. looks like i dun have the luck of owing such a lovely pair of sandals. *sighz* man and qiaoling went off after tt. zan and me proceeded to HMV. bought 2 pairs of black tops. lovely lovely. haha. but damn man, was raining and we 2 were stuck. decided to go NYDC to while away our time waiting for the rain to stop. zan asked me if i wanted to be an air stewardess... of coz i wanted! tt has been my dream for the longest time. but i always tot tt my chances are suite slim coz i have this stupid scar on my leg. after pondering for a while, i feel tt being a model is not bad at all. i nv know if i'll be scouted by mediacorp. haha. i can then be the next zoe!! can just earn money by just selling my face and smile. haha. but these 2 are just short lived jobs. wun really end me anywhere thou i think the pay can be quite high. *sighz sighz sighz*

meeting dear for dinner at the coffeeshop near my house. but orchard there jam. told him i'll be late and asked him to eat dinner alone 1st since he's hungry. i was hoping tt he would not be angry, but it turned out tt he really was not angry, he was damn furious. ignored me for the whole of diiner. even when i hold his hands or hug him he didnt respond. tt really broke my heart. dunno wat i can do to appease him. but iunderstand y he felt angry lor. it's like he's hungry yet i made him come all the eay to my hse and he ended up having dinner alone. his coldness reminded me of how rudy used to treat me. it's something i dun ever want to go thru again. ever. could not help it, but i started to break down. all he said was stop crying. no hugs, no nothing. i feel like i was really alone, no one to stand on my side. this barrier started to appear in my heart. i wanted him far from me. i dun want him to be close to me again. i moved myself away from him. think dear start to feel sad seeing me like this and started to hug me. but i feel tt it's just too late. the shadows cant seem to leave me. i suggested a breakup. i dun ever want to go thru hell again. i was adament in my decision. it was the perfect solution. he said he wants his life and emotions to be stable. i dun think i can give him tt anyway. cant really wat happen, but we kissed and patch up and end of story. i hope tt dear wun ever be cold towards me again. i dun want to go thru such pure torture anymore. anyway, i guess i owe him an apology. -sorry dear-

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

today is zan's birthday! *happy birthday to u, happy birthday to u! happy birthday to zan! happy birthday to u!! *claps claps*) will be gg out with her later. yupz. went shopping with dear yesterday for zan's pressie. i wanted to buy this half jacket(or whatever it is called) tt is 'in' at the moment and sort of stick beads or sew sequins on it. but then i realised the shop tt sells beads and stuff had already closed down. the worst thing is i cant find a nice half jacket. i saw this one she told me tt her friend bought. got dog one. but the design is a bit granny coz loads of frill, so didnt buy tt. walked ard for quite some time and cant find anything nice. haha. decided to seek help from man. she suggested bikini but very ex. then she reminded me of something so yeah, i bought tt stuff for zan. hope she likes it.. lol.. dun want out it here now in case zan reads it before i gave it to her.

anyway, was walking walking and walking along orchard when i saw someone. this someone is from Singapore Idol. my eyes were literaly glued to him. not coz he's handsome, but coz it's tt guy from singapore idol. he's David Yeo. haha. perhaps he noticed me staring at him. he looked at me for the longest time too. trying to fang(4) dian(4) with me sia. outrageous man. dear was just beside me holding my hand. but cant blame him lar. who asked me to be so pretty? lol.. he's quite hunky in real life. hunky not in the aspect of looks but physique. ya. was quite surprised.

dinner at dear's house was fabulous. had loads of yummy food. i ate tons of crabs and prawns man. ate till i feel so bloated. *burp* dear's mum is really very nice. she really treats me very well. whatever she gives dear to eat or drink she will include my share too. ginseng, herbal tea, blah.. ex stuff man. think dear is a bit jealous of me. haha. his mum specially brought down an unbrella for ME even thou it is only mou mou yu.. but it's ok lar dear, i'll still love u.. lol..

last night i had a nightmare. i dreamed of kailing. ya. i was showing her some photos of my hall pageant and she told me tt i'm the ugliest there!! *sob* then i quickly pointed a girl in the pic and declare loudly tt she's not pretty at all lor. but kialing kept saying i'm the worst-looking of the lot. ok lar, not exactly nightmare to u guys, but it was simply horrible for me!!

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

spent christmas playing mahjong with gel n kel. poor darling, didnt get enought of his usual 14 hrs of beauty sleep and was grumpy. kept saying he's so tired.. i dunno.. i felt quite sad at his mood.. he's not in a bad mood or wat, just that he felt very sianz at tt time. it's the 1st christmas tt we are spending together and his mood made me quite down. i kept thinking y he cant be ok and enjoy this joyous occasion together, yet at the same time angry at myself for even asking him to acc me when jan they all came over. if only i choose to celebrate xmas eve without him, everything would be ok.. but dear also quite nice.. know i buay song liao then he tried to appease me.. haha..

anyway gel bought a logcake from prima deli. it was quite delicious! thanks gel! *slurps* turned out tt kel's luck and taken a sharp turn.. he didnt win muz.. the only winners are gel and dear. haha.. but the big winner is ahem.. *drum roll* dear!! we won a bit only lar.. nothing compared to the $55 we lost to them.. haha..

went ECP to eat lunch yesterday. coz it was near a temple mum brought us to pray. ordered loads of stuff. ate till my stomach is going to burst man. there's stingray, prawn noodles, satay, bak ku tet, nasi lemak, drinks.. all in all there were too much satay and my mum n aunt ended up finishing the food. because mum n aunt were talking mum asked us to go to the beach walk walk. saw people kayaking. envy them man! i love kayaking and it's been a long long time since i kayaked. i really want to go ECP soon! can cycle, eat and everything!!

tmr is suzan's birthday. asked her to make a wishlist in her blog but she didnt. dunno wat i shud get for her also. if i got the ime i think i'll go town walk walk see if there's anything suitable. if not i'm sorry zan! i'll treat u to a snapple too k? lol.. would be going to dear's house to eat dinner later. his mum bought crabs and asked me over. his mum is just so nice!! always cook my favourite dish one. somemore i'm not even her daughter-in-law yet.. LOL.. *slurp slurp*

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

Darling is just so sweet! appeared at my door in the noon and bought me a pressie. he hid it in my room and i was pleasantly surprised to know he bought something for me even thou i dunno what he bought for me. it really caught me off guard coz he came into my hse empty handed, went into my room and locked himself inside. it was when he opened the door he told me he bought a pressie for me. i searched high and low man and finally found it! it's this green belt i wanted from zara! i love him to bits man! sorry i didnt get u a present. i was actually very touched coz after the trip to malaysia, darling is kinda broke, yet he still bought me such an ex present...

Kok Kiong called me yesterday noon and asked if i want meet up with our usual gang at dan's house.. but Dan already invited S07 people so in the end KK they all decided to come to my house instead for countdown and have some fun overnight.. turns out only me, darling and my youngest sis had our own countdown.. haha.. coz kk and jan were caught in a jam in orchard and were jammed for like 3 hours. LOL. poor thing. but the final turnout was me, darling, kk, jan, winstion (white one) and jeremy. martin wanted to come but couldnt make it coz i guess he's qte high on alcohol. expected coz martin is a hard-core chiongster at the moment. haha. anyway we played mahjong, where kk za hu! wah lan eh!! but winston's luck was really very good.worse thing is i tot he is super newbie in mahjong coz he told me he long time nv play le and my last impression of him playing mahjong was kinda bad.. haha.. we played in-between, daidi and blackjack. nothing muz lar actually. we guys didnt talk much, was kinda quiet. but somehow the silence was comforting. perhaps all of us had something to do tt's y.. just to add on one point, dear! ur daidi is damn zai man! *whistle* won loads of money and recovered our loss. but we also lost a bit in the end. they left at 815.

went to bed straight. later gg to kel's house to play mahjong also. dunno if dear is ok anot coz i think he's very tired. somemore we are meeting at 245 at my house bus stop, meaning tt he had less than 4 hrs of his beauty sleep. today's christmas, i hope everything will be joyous and happy. Merry Christmas to everyone!

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

made improvements to my blog again! i included a tag board and of coz my wish list.. this is the best i can do le man.. i know the wish list looks a bit off.. but i'll try to improve on it soon.. anyway today's christmas eve and i did not even have any program on! pathetic man.. haha..anyway might be gg to the stadium later to buy my red pair of slips on.. actually i saw it along time ago but tt time very broke mahz.. now i got cash to burn might as well go buy.. hope still have lor.. if not i'll be damn disappointed :(

last night i dreamed of sly!! handsome and cool sly sitting beside me in a cab and everybody was damn envious of me.. lol.. siao liao.. but in my stupid dream i kept screaming like a siao fan lor.. haha.. it's been ages since i screamed so crazily.. yest after dinner suddenly had this craving for the mudpie zan and man ate the other day we went out. haha.. went to causeway point but then i realised it had already closed down.. sighz.. but it's ok.. ltr if dear wakes up early perhaps i might make a trip to town buy my slippers as well as have the mud pie *slurps*

tmr is christmas.. no program, but gel asked me to play mahjong and she will be buying log cakes.. i wanted to make chocolate cheesecake initially but then i decided against it. dun even know if the shop in sembawang would be opened today at all.

wanted to include loads of stuff yest in my blog but they sorta all slip off my mind le.. cant remember any single damn thing. was simply too exhausted to do anything after working in dad's shop. *stretch*

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

OMG!! Cat believe it man.. went to my parents room to return the remaining money mum gave me this noon to buy some stuff.. my dad suddenly asked me if i have enough money to spend and i said yupz.. he walked towards his bag and i said no need.. i dun want.. then i went to toilet liao.. actually i was only expecting him to give me $50 bucks at most or some amt like $20.. when i went back to my room i realised tt he gave me a $100.. OMG!! Somemore i am really damn broke at this moment of time.. dear too lor.. haha.. i better use this money wisely man.. mum's gg malaysia again for her tat heat pressure treatment, got a term for it one but i forgot. it's something like use a cup with heated air inside it and they put it on the areas where it it aching.. yupz.. she claimed tt it's gd.. i already promised zan and manling to go ECP with them tmr to balde and cycle. but i have to break my promise my promise in the end coz dad is shorthanded at the shop nad i need to go help me. bobian coz bro has sch tmr and one of my sisters is working and the other one too young.. once again, sorry zan and manling!! i definitely will go next time!!

this noon went to city area to acc her meet her customers. while waiting for her, i was reading 8 days and looking for a place to sit. my youngest sister told me there were 2 chairs at this corner. they are actually massage chairs lor. seeing no one is using it i quickly plonk my bum down on the chair. within 5 seconds, this loud and sharp siren rang in my ears!! i immediately jumped up and the security guard came over and said cannot sit, if not alarm will go off.. wah pianzg eh!! so damn sia suay man.. pai seh like mad!! people looking lor!! i literally use the mag to cover my face liao.. kaoz..

anyway guys, have u realised tt my cursor has this moving stars? i'm so damn proud of myself can. haha.. finally i succeeded. discovered tt it's not tt hard after all. wanted to customize more one but i scare too fanciful like very cheap like tt. my next uphill task would be to upload pics here man.. yeah!! d/l the hello thingy but i am totally clueless on how to use this but hey, give me some time man.. nothing is too hard for such a brainy genius like me! to friends who have been reading my blog regularly, ple be assured tt i'll try not to change my blogskin too often. i know i know.. this is the 4th le.. haha.. ok.. time to give my blog some identity.. just let me surf ard for more interesting and cute stuff k? night!! *yawn*

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

Heng man. i managed to chane my subject code from 00464 to 00463. if not i'll be all alone in tt damn bloody piece of shit 00464. somemore tt class ends at 1830!! piangz.. it was a bad start lor this morning.. i was actually one of thoes who mamaged to log into STAR. i manage to add my 1st core and when i added my second core, i waited to some shit 30 minutes to confirm man. i kept thinking die liao lar.. pple sure confirm added liao then me cannot get my ideal timetable liao.. then those pple registering in sch's lib told me they also jammed. fu*k lor. then i tot gel was worse coz she could not even get into the main page. then suddenly she msned me and told me she added all liao. i'm like, "shucks!! i think i cannot get into the class i want liao!" luckily xinyu was at the lib and she manages to help me to add the remaining.. thanks xinyu!!*muachz* but xinyu told me 00462 no more vacancies liao i starte to panic coz i didnt have any backup for 00462. all along i tot i sure get in one but i didnt expect the STAR system to be so kok up. anyway, then gel told me to try 00464 coz got vacancies.. coz she manages to chk the vacancies but i cant due to the damn kok up STAR system.. then i discovered tt 00463 is a better one coz at least i dun have to waste my time on breaks lor.. but the system damn kok!! i cant change!! i started to feel so sianz and angry coz i registered earlier then gel and she manges to get in but i cant thou i registered way earlier!! ( if u r reading this gel, dun angry hor coz i just dunno y the system so siao. i dun mean tt i dun want sme class as u..) ya lor.. then 1130 liao and the registration is closed!! in addition, there is no more vacancies for 00463!!! minyi called to tell me can try again at 5. poor minyi lor.. she went to sch so damn early but she cant get her ideal timetable all due to the f*cked up STAR system. kaoz. wtf.wth. aighz.. ok.. back to my story.. luckily i managed to change from 00464 to 00463. ya. that' the crux of the whole damn bloody f*ked up morning. but gel also very nice lar.. she helped me to ask her friend to help me register also.. ya lor.. thanks gel! *huggies* ok.. now me gtg le.. gg hm to eat dinner with mr ng cheehui aka the frankenstein right zan n man? lol..

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

wah lau eh.. lost over $50 bucks at kels' place today man! actually long time nv lose le lor.. suddenly lost also feel a bit weird.. sighz.. but it's ok lar.. like darling always says, "gambling is all about the law of average." His own theory lar.. haha.. but kel's luck really damn gd lor.. 2 tai can hua shang till man liao.. piangz eh!! today ialso suay to the max lor.. max i win also 2 tai.. somemore think i hu less then 5 times man.. sianz.. i play till i feel like crying man.. wanted to leave early one but.. hehe.. anyway, i feel loved today.. as in darling nv lose his temper at me despite the fact tt he lost alot.. sighz.. but i treated him to full cream milk ok?! haha.. gg to bid for timetable soon.. feel damn sianz coz i really no mood to study le.. i think of next sem i really feel damn stress.. it's like wtf kind of feeling lor..

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

Hey guys.. i took this from someone's blog.. haha.. ya.. tot it was qte interesting.. so ya..

You'll know that you miss someone very much,
When every time you think of that person,
Your heart beats faster.
And just a quick warm 'Hello' from that person calms you down.

Bottomline: You might have fallen for that person,it's just that you do not realise or refuse to admit.

Don't be too good, I will miss you.
Don't be too caring, I might like you.
Don't be too sweet, I might fall for you.
It's hard for me to love you when you won't love me after all.

Bottomline: A person who makes me love him/her is actually a person who loves me more than I love him/her.

If someone comes into your life and becomes a part of you,
But for some reasons he couldn't stay,
Don't cry too much.
Just be glad that your paths crossed and somehow he made you happy even for a while.

Bottomline: Time will tell. If he is yours, he will come back.

Don't throw your back to love when it's already in front of you,
Don't drive it away from you because if you did,
Someday you'll regret why you let love flown awaywhen it was once right in front of you.

Bottomline: Treasure the one who loves you, it's not easy to find a person who loves you. It's always more valuable to have a sincere heart.

The greatest regrets in our lives are the risks we did not take.
If you think something will make you happy, go for it.
Remember,we only pass this way once.

Bottomline: Time doesn't wait. If you think youhave found the right one, treasure him/her. Don't let he/she go away. Don't let fear hold you back. Give it a try or else you might regret later. No one knows what can truly make you happy except yourself.

Two teardrops were floating down the river.
One teardrop said to the other,I'm the teardrop of a girl who l oved a man and lost him.
Who are you?
'I'm the teardrop of the man who regret letting a girl go.

Bottomline: Nobody will sympathise a person who constantly let chances pass by without making any efforts to salvage. We usually don't realise how important our loved ones are until they have left us and we'll start reminiscences which results in misery.

There are so many stars in the sky but only some are radiant enough to catch your attention.
Among those that you chose to ignore is that one star that is willing to continue shining for you,
Even when your glance remains elsewhere.

Bottomline: (1) The current person whom you are with may/may NOT be the one you truly love.(2) A person who knows that he/she can't be with you and yet continue to love youwhole-heartedly for what you are is touching. Think about it.

It's so funny how we set qualifications for the right person to love,
While at the back of our minds we know that the person we truly love will always be an exception.

Bottomline: We are critical especially to the one we like or love because we want him/her to be the best constantly seeking for perfection, which should be worked out by both parties in a relationship and not one party alone to shoulder the burden.

Love can make you happy although often times it hurts.
But love is only special if you give it to someone who is worthy.

Bottomline: If you have found someone who truly appreciates you, he/she deserves more of your love. ATTITUDE, not ATTITUDE, determines ALTITUDE

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

Went to Johore with Gel, Kel and of coz darling to shop today.. wah lau.. bad start, got this sickening nan ren, step on my sandals and caused the straps to snap and break!! he just say sorry and then hit hit backside and left hurriedly.. zhen de shi qi si wo le.. haha.. being in malaysia is a totally new feeling.. ther are lots and lots of pple everywhere and the taxi drivers there are money-suckers.. they dun charge by meter one lor.. instead u state where u want to go, how many pple then they will give u a price see if u want take their cab anot.. kaoz! so after some asking ard and coz it starts ti rain, we agreed to take this cab which charge us RM$20 to bring us to Malaysia Plaza where we started our 1st shopping for the day..

Malaysia Plaza is something like Far East Plaza.. woah~ damn loads of imitation goods.. but seriously, it's kinda hard to really distinguish the genuine from the imitations! I could not resist the temptation man.. went ahead to buy this Dior coin pouch.. mind u, it's Dior hor.. haha.. it's damn cheap! only RM$10.. haha.. it's simply too good a deal to resist.. Plaza is really very big.. but nothing muz to buy.. after tt, we went to this hawker where we indulge in all kinds of seafood, all for only RM$165.. so guys, check for urself if it's a gd deal! after the meal, we were too full to walk man.. then darling so funny.. he started to show off his disgusting huge pot belly for all to see!! then the rest of us just started to show off too.. it was hilarious.. but i have the smallest!! yeah!!

Black pepper crabs
oatmeal prawns
butter fried calamari (yummy thou i crunch a stone)
crayfish ( the most ex!!)
stingray
xiao bai cai
4 big jugs of sugar cane

we then headed to city square.. tt's where the real shopping is.. it's so like wisma.. ya lor.. or shud i say heeren.. ya.. bought a pair of slippers from vincci.. some of the shoes are real nice.. i saw this turquiose pair but dun have my size.. my feet too big sia.. oh ya, i also bought this mickey mouse top from this shop.. haha but it's so damn ex!! RM$99!! But i just love it!! actually i didnt spend muz there coz i really wanted to buy the top.. yet at the same time so xin tong!! ya.. i wanted to buy sunglasses and bag one.. but didnt manage to see any tt i like..

at the end of every thing, it was already close to 10.. we headed straight to custom and it was so godamn crowded!! luckily me and dear were still in very high spirits.. love him to bits for it.. i hate gg out people who ended up bad-tempered.. like very spoilsport.. haha.. he's just so silly.. say wat millenium countdown.. haha.. and he practically treats everybody there as his imaginary competitors.. but it was rather fun and distracted us from those irritating crowd and the stuffiness we were feeling.. heehee... anyway, gel got qte pissed wih this ah na.. his arm hairs so bushy!! keep brushing against her arms.. haha.. poor gel.. somemore u got elbowed in her u know where.. ya.. so after tt kel was protecting her for the rest of the duration in the malaysia custom..

we literally chiong to singapore custom after tt.. half running anf half walking.. oh man.. i really can feel all my fats burning.. think this got to be the most vigorous exercise i did for this 1.5 years.. haha.. ok.. after tt it's back to singapore.. finally can breathe a sigh of relief.. coz i tot it was gg to be dangerous and stuff.. but it turns out to be fun!! actually hor.. bring guys also a bit the sianz.. i mean not i sianz lar.. think they very sianz lor.. kel and dear kept asking me n gel to try on shoes so tt they can sit down and rest their legs.. so unmanly lor... hahaha.. but gel is right.. the more pple the more fun it is man.. looking forward to my next trip with spontaneous people who are interested to go..

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

Love is like standing on wet cement, the longer you stay the harder it is to leave and you can never go without leaving your prints behind...
Don't love a person like a flower, because a flower dies in season.
Love them like a river because a river flows forever...
Love doesn't have to have a happy Ending, 'cause love doesn't have to end at all
(i stole this from someone else's blog coz i think it's qte meaningful)

Yeah~ went to town yesterday with ml n zan.. it's been a super long time since i last saw ml man.. think she almost look the same, if niot prettier.. we didnt really go town to search, instead we went to coffee club to just chill out and catch up on each other.. initially i tot there would be some kind of awkwardness btw me n ml coz long time nv meet le.. but heng ah.. went there to just chat and discovered tt ml is attached now, to someone who made her feel warma nd secure.. lol.. i think this is gg to be her most serious relationship.. zan! if u're reading this, better add oil man.. so next time we all can go on triple dates.. lol.. hmm.. speaking if shich, i think zl really had a big impact on zan.. i dun remember zan being so upset, n hard to let go.. but i think she's strong, and with all her friends' love for her, hope she will get over him pretty fast.. actually i also dun really know wat she's gg thru, coz i've nv been in her shoes before.. so i can only try to empathise with her.. speaking of which i think i honestly think she deserves someone better..

after spending qte some time at coffee lub, we head straight to billy bombers at heeren.. haha.. actually i made tt suggestion coz my stomach's been growling.. haha.. bet they didnt know tt... shh.. anyway, i had sirloin steak, ml golden crispy honey stung chicken and suzan, this 4 coz meal.. ya.. she's very greedy right? lol.. yeah.. i love anything wth black pepper.. the heavier the better.. anyway was eating halfway when ml's chicken bone flew out onto the floor.. haha.. oh ya.. ml is damn mean!! she refuses to give up seats to those waiting at the queue coz she thinks it's their own fault for coming in late!! omg!! tt was damn funny man.. the 2nd funny thing tt happened was when zan's so called desserts arrived.. we were expecting like maybe a slice of cake, or even a scooop of icce-cream.. what i saw next totally trigger off my laughing gas.. it was just 2 pathetic mini weeney small cubes of oreo cheesecake man.. LOL!!

after which we went to take some pics.. was damn sad.. my digicam only chooses certain people to work it.. haha.. so in the end we managed to only talk one pic of the 3 of us.. haha.. but ok lar.. the photos turned out to be ok.. suddenly think of zan.. she's getting more bhb man.. she told us one small incident abt bumping into this guy's gf.. only to say tt the gf thinks she pretty and stuff... piangz!! go one round to tell us others think she's pretty.. haha.. ya.. tt's how thick-skinned zan can be.. haha.. but it's ok.. coz i think we are used to it.. or maybe all of us are just so like this.. lol.. anyway we went home after tt and i feel qte happy to be able to hang out with them again.. it's been fun.. meet up soon again~ ciao!

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

i miss him right now.. dunno y.. things are ok le.. just want to see him at this very moment... dunno if he will come to look for me.. haha.. but it's k lar.. even if nv come also forget it.. i dun like to raise my hopes too high.. scare later we quarral again.. sighz.. i dunno if it's me or wat..

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

sighz.. wt a boring day it's going to be.. he's angry at me.. nv return my smses.. i dunno lar.. i also dunno y i quarral with him.. guess i always expect him to do something then he nv do lor.. last time when i was staying in hall and didnt have dinner he would pack food for me to eat.. last night i didnt even have dinner and he's having a hell out of fun with his jc friends.. i tot maybe after his dinner he would buy some stuff for me to eat but looks like he'e keen on staying there forever with his so fun friends.. it's always been the case.. nv abt me.. it's always been his computer games, his soccer or friends.. last time he went out also till very late.. spend the time catching up with his friends he claimed.. then wat abt me? he forever has nothing to say to me.. i'm always the one yakking on the fone while he just either smile, give comments for the sake of giving those worthless comments or he just shut up and not say anything at all.. but with his friends, he has endless stuff to talk abt.. perhaps he's happier with his friends, not me, perhaps zan was right in saying tt army guys are just looking for companionship to burn their weekends.. i feel like one.. i dun understand also y he come my house like always so bad mood.. esp on his night out.. the 1st time it happened he said he wun happen again, then it happened for the second time and then 3rd time.. if he's so unhappy coming then i rather he not come.. spend the time with his friends or wat lor.. i dun think i'm the one for him anyway.. maybe someone who he has endless stuff to talk abt or has the same interest in him in soccer would be ideal for him.. if he's betting on soccer, his hp would be ringing incessantly.. i cant stand it.. i told him tt weekend shud be our quality time.. he said ok, he would ask his friends to find smebody else.. but then tt was just a lie.. he promised me he can give me a fairy tale like romance, but tt didnt happen.. he promised me he will treasure me and treat me like a princess but tt didnt happen either.. he said he would open up to me.. but tt didnt happen either.. i was always the last to know what is gg on in his life.. i feel like shit.

Perhaps we shud not even be together.. we quarral yesterday and i suggested tt we break off since from wat he said, he's simply implaying tt we wun last beyond his uni days.. since a breakup is inevitable in the long run, might as well end now and he said alright.. *sob* wat am i to him? for this nearly 1 year of being together, he had nv asked me if i want to stay, asked me to stay.. with or without me, his life would still be the same, if not happier.. he said he cant live without me, haha.. but from all the things he's done and said i'll be a fool to believe him.. perhaps we human beings shud always take things with a pinch of salt.. from my relationship with rudy, i already learned nothing is forever.. people changed with environmnt and feelings change too.. since he already acknowledged the fact tt we would not last, then wat's the point of being together now? i guess i shud just be strong. who say women cant live without men?

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

so tired right now man.. slept for less than 7 hrs.. i'm so tired i simply have no appetite.. yest was the date tt marked my 4th aunt's 3rd year death anniversary.. went to fold joss paper for her yest with my aunts and cousins.. while i was there my cousin ( son of my 4th aunt) told us tt when he went upstairs to take some stuff, he saw my 4th aunt in the hse.. he quickly ran away.. i dun think it's eerie or anything like tt.. but it sorta made me believe in life after death.. i dunno.. i mean, there was no one else at the hse le.. somemore how could my cousin not recognise his own mum? ya.. so i think it's still best to do some merits while u are still alive and have the chance to make some amends while u have the chance to.. in case one day u just suddenly died and be forced to go into hell.. ok.. sound a bit scary.. but seriously i dun think my cousin was lying.. ya.. what's there to lie abt this kind of stuff..

tt day i was quarraling with dear over my social life.. gel told me abt hers too.. both of us seem to be in the same boat.. we practically have nil social life ever since we got attached.. i'm not blaming cheehui lar.. coz he also nv stop me or wat mahz.. it's just tt i dunno y i always feel so damned obliged to acc him esp when he book out or wat.. i know he does not mind me gg out with my friends and leaving him alone but i just could not help him coz i dun like him to be alone.. dunno y.. but now he's also out with his friends.. haha.. think i also got to learn how to let go of such an irritating and stressful oligation.. i shud not hang out with him all the time man.. i feel tt for a couple to really last, they need to be indepdendent and have their own social life and own fun.. i dun want to repeat the kind of mistake i made when i was with rudy.. i realised i was totally alone when we broke up.. thanks to jan and christine they all.. i realised tt i'm not alone after all.. and also i'm grateful tt zan they all stood by me thou my temper then was disastrous.. haha.. i hope tt i'm not so bad tempered to anyone anymore.. ya.. it's been a long long time since i last went clubbing.. i really want to go.. i desparately want to go! i want to just go unwind..

Results are gg to be out tmr.. i dreaded it althou i was damn freaking excited abt it just a few weeks back.. i dunno.. i guess i just dun want to raise my hopes too high... in case my results turned out to be as bad as GE.. I dun want to fall down as hard man.. i just hope tt this time i'll score better coz i feel tt i out in qte alot of effort.. somemore i dun think i'm a dumb person.. come on man.. after all i ranked second in my class for a level and been always a teacher's pet for my gd results.. thou not in sec 3 n sec 4 due to unwanted distractions.. sighz.. if i really scored very very badly, i guess i'll asked whoever score as badly or disappointed with their results out for a drink.. haha.. drown down all my sorrows.. lol.. dear would like tt.. thou i'm sure he will kill me first.. lol.. *pray pray pray*

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

just came back from my dad's shop.. damn tired.. went to run alot of errands for him today.. but nvm.. in return i got ringgit $300 for my shopping spree in johore this coming sat.. yeah! hope i can find things to buy over there.. esp clothes and bags and shoes!! went bugis yest with my sister.. wanted to go there pray for gd results but didnt go in the end.. anyway, went to bugis village where i saw this von dutch crystal stud baseball cap.. it's so damn cool.. fell in love with it the moment i saw it.. but it's super ex.. $19.. somemore i dun even think i'll wear it frequently.. it's just so nice!! hope i'll be able to find it in malaysia this sat.. and i hope the next time i go malaysia i'll be able to go with more of my friends.. zan, hope u will be able to make it.. i love ur taste of clothes! it's definitely way muz better than cheehui's.. lol.. sorry dear.. haha..
Anyway was reading zan's blog a min ago.. haha.. she looks like she really condamn ( is this how u spell it ) army guys.. poor guys.. haha.. but i cant really blame her coz wat she said is totally true.. haha.. envy her sia.. at least pple are still saying she's pretty and stuff.. it's been a long long time since pple said i'm pretty.. even my dear dun say i'm beautiful except when i hinted to him bluntly i want him to say i'm beautiful.. superficial mehz? no mahz.. looks are wat it matters these days.. pple.. if u really think i'm pretty.. pls tell me!! LOL.. I need all the compliments.. i promised i wun fly and my head wun swell.. LOL..
Gel called me last night and it seems like she's real stressed abt money issues and wat the future holds.. but i also envy her at the same time coz she's now working in a prestigious bank and i think prospects are looking gd for her.. ya lor.. the pay is damn high too.. given a chance i also will want to work in tt bank.. i also worry abt wat the future holds.. but i think i cannot really change or control anything except my grades.. even say so, i feel so damn bloody disappointed in my GE results.. tot i'll get at least a B.. but i got C!! damn.. tt really destroyed watever glint of hope i have( better results i mean).. *sighz* i hope my results would be better than last sem.. then at least i can enjoy myself happily this sat.. *cross fingers*

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

Haha.. i know it's been a long long time since i enter another entry here.. but heck.. i'm bored to tears at this very moment..
Went shopping with zan yesterday and it was really really very fun!! Really forgot how fun it can be to go shopping with ur bestest friend.. we went to far east first where i bought 2 tops which are quite similar from candle.. but wth.. zan's taste of clothes is really superb! i know i can definitely trust her.. haha.. next stop was forever 21 where zan tried on many hats and looked funny in most of them.. but it was really fun!! haha.. we really shud do it again man.. while walking we just talked abt many many stuff.. from friends to relationships.. but wat left the deepest impression on me was one qn zan asked me in mac.. she asked me whether it is possible to find someone who fits all ur criterion of an ideal partner yet u dun have sparks with tt someone.. she got me puzzled.. i didnt ans.. haha.. but after giving it some tot, i dun think it's possible.. coz i think usually ur criterion of someone shud be something tt is similar to ur character and lifestyle.. and most likely u 2 husd have the same goals and passion so shud be able to click.. i dunno.. well.. haha..
After wisma, we head straight to hmv, where zan tied up her hair.. i really think she looked fabulous! she's right.. her best features are really her eyes.. they just seemed to sparkle.. somemore she's so tanned.. so seh sia.. lol.. somemore she was wearing little makeup.. if i were a guy.. i sure would be attracted to her man.. talking to zan has always been fun.. i dunno.. she does not seem to judge you and she listens and i think gives good advice.. ok.. hmv does not seem to have my kind of clothes.. haha.. maybe i'm old le.. it's just so hard to find clothes tt i love to bits at this phase of my life.. now i'm more into casual.. mini tees, jeans.. but i'm like so fair.. dunno whether tees will suit me.. haha.. i've always tot tees and jeans suit people who are very tanned..
anyway, was approached by 4-5 people who claimed they are talent scouting or wat recruiting models.. i was indeed flattered.. but then on second tots, i wonder if they approached me coz of my height or coz of my looks? haha.. i definitely wish it's the latter of coz.. i would definitely choose looks over height.. back hm i told my mum abt it and she wsa like go give it a try.. my first instinct was to say siao.. really mahz.. i always think tt these people are just out to earn your money.. if not y else would they just want to approach any girl.. somemore like so desparately like tt.. sighz..
anyway yest was indeed very fun.. it made me believe firmly tt shopping shud only be done strictly with best female friends and not ur bf.. it would be a deadly sin to bring ur bf coz they know nuts abt which bra to wear with which top, the diff cuts of skirt thou they looked the same, blah blah blah... haha.. alright.. signing off....

♥ -Dollicious-Sinner-

Leo. Monies. Happiness. Gold. Red. Black. Tom-Yum. Chocolates. Nerdy Bob. Eyeliner. Mascara. Family. Mahjong. Friends. Love. Independent. Reading. Sleeping. Shopping. Clubbing. Curls. Taking pictures. Confident. The 4 ladies in my life. Competitive. Laughter. Tears. Sun Rays. Excitement. Beer. Thrill.



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